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Showing posts with the label #Communication

5 Communication Tweaks That Increase Intimacy

  #Communication #trust #Empathy #Attachment #mirroring #reciprocating #apology #defensive #Psychology “Working on our communication” is one of the most commonly cited reasons couples seek relationship counseling. This is not surprising. Often, over time, even the best of relationships can fall victim to negative communication patterns. This is especially true for couples who find themselves under a lot of stress because, naturally, when our coping mechanisms are overtaxed, we default to older—more primitive and less mature—ways of coping (cf. Weinberger & Stoycheva, 2019). A colleague used to say that when we are distressed, we become caricatures of ourselves—i.e., our worst qualities become exaggerated. It gets harder to employ our most thought-out and balanced ways of interacting with the world. However, several tweaks only require a little time or effort, just repetition, and attention to our automatic behaviors that we can make to improve our connection with our partners. In a

Bell Hooks - To Truly Love

 #BellHooks #Love #Respect #trust  #Communication  #Triple5LightTherapy #BlackTherapist #Therapy

What Am I Doing to My Kid When I Yell? (video)

#Yelling #Children #Parents #Communication #Triple5LightTherapy.com #BlackTherapist #Psychotherapy #LGBTAffirmingTherapy When kids misbehave, yelling feels like a natural response, particularly if parents are stressed out and their tolerance for nonsense has worn thin. The messiness and monotony of parenting requires extreme patience, and yelling is a whole lot easier and more instinctive than pausing to react calmly. Many parents find themselves shouting at their children without really knowing why. But, despite the fact that yelling at your kids feels like a release, a form of discipline, and maybe the only way to get their attention, it’s important to understand the psychological effects that yelling at kids can have. As provocative as some behaviors may seem, little kids simply don’t have the emotional sophistication to fully understand adult frustration. And the psychological effects of yelling at toddlers repeatedly can be long-term, with the potential to change the way th

Alan Alda: Build empathy. Monitor your relationships.

#Empathy #AlanAlda  #BigThinkEdge  #Communication  Empathy is a superpower for connecting and communicating with others, but it can be surprisingly fragile. Even a bad mood or preoccupied mind can easily close us off to the people – even the ones we're closest to, let alone to colleagues or strangers on the daily commute. Noticing this, Alan Alda wondered what exercises could help bulk up his "empathy muscle" regardless of shifting circumstances. An exercise he invented became the focus of a psychological study that discovered a way to significantly increase empathy. Alan Alda teaches "The Art and Science of Relating: Build and Monitor Empathy" for Big Think Edge. Empathy tends to evaporate when we don't practice it. At Big Think Edge, Alan Alda teaches an immediately actionable video lesson that will teach you exercises to significantly grow your capacity for empathy. Greater empathy is an asset whether you're looking to boost your c

Five Simple Ways to Start Communicating More Mindfully

#Communication #HealthyRelationship #Mindfulness  If you've ever practiced mindfulness, you're probably already aware of the many benefits it offers for the willing and dedicated practitioner. When we open ourselves to this practice, we create the potential for our lives to be transformed in ways that might seem subtle but are truly life-altering. Though many of the benefits of mindfulness are personal and internal—improved concentration, expanded sense of awareness, increased patience, and enduring states of tranquility, to name a few—some important aspects of the practice can positively affect our external experience as well. Take communication, for example. Using mindfulness in our communication with others can improve our relationships and help us navigate even the most difficult conversations. If you already have a practice of cultivating mindfulness, a little intention is all you’ll need to start applying it to your communication. If you haven’t yet developed a pra

How shutting down your feelings can be disastrous to your relationship.

  #Emotions #HealthyRelationships #Communication Research has shown that suppressing your emotions pretty well shuts down communication within that relationship. Let's chat about what the findings from one study might mean for your relationship. James Gross, a scientist who studies emotion, found that when we try to suppress emotion, this is what happens: • It's very hard to do - basically it doesn't work. We have to work very hard to shut an emotion down once it is up and running, and in the process, we often get more agitated and tense. This is especially true in close relationships when the trigger for the emotion, the other person, is still there giving us signals that get us all fired up. • Emotion doesn't stay inside our skin. When we try to shut feelings off, the people we are relating to also get more and more tense. When we are denying our feelings, our partners probably get tense because our faces register our feelings way faster than the thinking part of the