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4 Strategies for practicing Radical Self-Acceptance


Radical Self-Acceptance Painting by Jennifer Mazzucco

#mindfulness #self-judgment #RadicalSelfAcceptance #negativethinkingpatterns #thoughts

Radical acceptance involves acknowledging how life unfolds without resistance, even if we don't like things at any given moment. It can take effort to apply this principle. How can we begin to accept our situation and ourselves despite experiencing anxiety, uncertainty, and fear?

Why self-acceptance is not the same as complacency.

It is essential now, more than ever, to practice radical self-acceptance. This means training ourselves to find inner stability despite unpredictable external circumstances. Ultimately, we are responsible for acknowledging our hidden wounds, which can lead to personal and collective growth.

Radical self-acceptance is the opposite of avoiding responsibility or giving up in self-defeat. It requires pushing against old ways of being to open the door to deep healing. Embracing radical self-acceptance allows us to integrate our shadow aspects and live authentically. By resisting the urge to repress, numb, react, excuse, or deny, we can become better citizens and positively contribute to our communities.

Here are four methods for cultivating radical self-acceptance:

1. Slow down whenever you feel yourself starting to self-judge.

When you feel the familiar self-judgment after saying or doing something you regret, take a moment to breathe. Acknowledge your feelings without brushing them off. Be open and allow yourself to be as you are without making excuses or avoiding the situation. 

You can repeat this phrase to help change negative thought patterns: "This is the situation, and I deeply and completely accept myself as I am."

2. Remember that every setback is a learning opportunity.

The next time you feel this way, engage in an internal conversation that helps you solve the problem instead of getting caught in a cycle of self-blame. Here are three positive statements to use when your perfectionism or self-criticism arises:

  •         I wonder what I was feeling when I did that?
  •        That's OK; I'm still learning.
  •        I wonder what I will do differently next time?

3. Avoid comparison.

It's common to get caught up in comparing ourselves to others and feeling like we fall short. This can take a toll on our self-esteem. It's important to remember that we can't accurately judge our own worth based on what we see of others. We don't know what's really going on in their lives. Instead of comparing ourselves to others, we should focus on our goals and measure our success based on our progress. If you find yourself stuck in a negative thought pattern, ask yourself, "What am I thinking? What am I feeling? What's the next right thing to do?" Then, refocus on your own unique journey.

4. Lean on the practices that remind you that thoughts are fleeting.

The next time you feel self-critical, try a practice that can lead you to a more positive state of mind and remind you that thoughts are fleeting. This practice can be meditation, tapping, walking, or being of service to others.

Above all, try to be as present with yourself as possible, moving into self-acceptance to show up in your center. Radical self-acceptance means being thankful for your assets, mistakes, misunderstandings, failings, and everything that has brought you to now. It's the epitome of compassion in action and how we become the highest version of ourselves.


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