Texting and dating: One of the worst things you can do in a new relationship is text

#Relationship #CellPhone #Texting #Dating #Deathbytext #Textmessages #BlackMaleTherapist #Triple5Light.com #Couplestherapy

Dating couples often make the mistake of #texting everything instead of talking on the phone or simply meeting in person.
That's according to Claudia Duran, a Miami-based matchmaker with Elite Connections.
Duran said the meaning of text messages can easily be misconstrued and hurtful when someone doesn't text back right away.

Claudia Duran calls it "death by text."

"Two people like each other, and they're a little scared, and they're a little hesitant," she said. "And so they text everything."

Duran is a Miami-based matchmaker with Elite Connections. She works with Miami's affluent singles and people who are clearly invested in finding a relationship: A basic six-month membership costs $15,000, and a global membership (meaning you can meet people worldwide) costs at least $75,000.

Death by text is something Duran has observed over and over again. "Text is wonderful for logistics," she told me when we spoke by phone in July. But the meaning of a text message can also be easily "misconstrued."

What's more, Duran said, some people take offense if their partner takes a (seemingly) long time to text back.

Some research backs up Duran's argument.

A 2013 study published in the Journal of Couple and Relationship Therapy found that men who frequently sent or received texts from their partner were less satisfied with the relationship— and their partners were, too. (Conversely, women who texted their partner a lot said their relationship was more stable.)

The lead study author, marriage, and family therapist Lori Schade, told NPR: "Maybe it was a way for them [men] to check out or not have to show up, by using their cellphone instead."

Duran encourages all her clients to speak on the phone or meet up in person whenever possible. "Particularly when they start having feelings for each other," she added. "It's really important."

By Shana Lebowitz, www.businessinsider.com - July 14th, 2018

Comments

What is "intimacy avoidance"? (Glossary of Narcissistic Relationships)

#Intimacy #Narcissistic Relationships #IntimacyAvoidance #Therapy, #Triple5light.com ACON Adult Children of Narcissists BAITING A narcissist loves to provoke a reaction from you, especially in public. They will provoke you into responding in an angry or emotional manner. (Your angry response is further evidence of your unbalanced state of mind). BLACK SHEEP The black sheep is blamed for just about everything that goes wrong within the dysfunctional family. They can’t do anything right. Their achievements are not recognized by the narcissistic parent and are swept under the carpet. BOUNDARIES Boundaries are a code of conduct or an unwritten set of rules which we consider to be reasonable behavior from those around us and our response when someone steps over the line. CLOSURE Closure in a normal relationship involves open and honest communication about what has gone wrong, you then wish each other well, say goodbye and move on. After a relationship with a narcissist e

How a Group of Gay Male Ballet Dancers Is Rethinking Masculinity

#Queerness #Dancers #Ballet #Masculinity #Dance #LGBTQ #Gay These men are finding new stages on which to express their #queerness, collapsing gender barriers in the world of dance. 1. The Ballerino When I was 15, I met a dancer from Canada’s Royal Winnipeg Ballet . The company had come to Los Angeles to dance in the Olympic Arts Festival , and my parents volunteered to host a post-performance dinner in our backyard. I recall about 200 people — family friends, Olympic officials and maybe 25 dancers — eating curry (is that right?) off paper plates. But that’s not what this is about. No, this is about the ballerino — my word for him — I met and what he represented to a lonely gay kid in Southern California in 1984, a kid who had never before met another gay person. Earlier that evening, I had seen the dancer turn, leap and smile onstage, expressing through the mute language of ballet who he was. Something about his movement told me he was gay, and I felt he was dancing not

Juneteenth: An important day that marks the end of slavery in the United States.

#Juneteenth #Hope #Empowerment #Celebration #EmancipationProclamation #AbrahamLincoln #Holiday #BlackAmerican #AfricanAmerican #AmericaHistory #AfricanAmericantherapist #Triple5LightTherapy The Emancipation Proclamation, issued by President Abraham Lincoln on January 1, 1863, declared freedom for enslaved people in Confederate states. However, it took over two years for the news to reach enslaved African Americans in Galveston, Texas. On June 19, 1865, Union Gen. Gordon Granger arrived in Galveston and personally announced the end of slavery, effectively emancipating the remaining enslaved individuals in Texas. His arrival and announcement marked a turning point in the history of slavery in the United States. This momentous event became known as Juneteenth, a combination of 'June' and 'nineteenth.' Juneteenth is a day to remember and celebrate. It's an opportunity to honor, recognize, and celebrate the achievements and contributions of Black Americans to the n

"Love is a combination of six ingredients: care, commitment, knowledge, responsibility, respect and trust". Bell Hooks

#AfricanAmerican #BellHooks #Love #Respect #WhereWeStand #ClassMatters "Love is a combination of six ingredients: care, commitment, knowledge, responsibility, respect and trust". Bell Hooks A writer, teacher and cultural critic, bell hooks is best known for her work examining systems of domination, especially racism and patriarchy, and how they may be overcome. She has published more than twenty books, including Talking Back: Thinking Feminist, Thinking Black; Killing Rage: Ending Racism , and Where We Stand: Class Matters . hooks says that uncovering and naming the forms of oppression in our society is an extension of her lifelong curiosity about love and her desire to see love manifested. “Perhaps the most common false assumption about love is that it means we will not be challenged or changed,” she once wrote in the Buddhist magazine Shambhala Sun . “When I write provocative social and cultural criticism that causes readers to stretch their minds, to think

Triple5Light Therapy

Search This Blog